Monday, 6 January 2014

My Heart Breaks For The Man I Love

I'm struggling with what to call this post. In some ways the inevitable has finally happened. The walls of Jericho tumbling down may seem excessive but somehow fitting.  The mighty giant has fallen?  That too seems a bit exaggeratory.  However I hope you can catch my drift.

We've all heard the saying of when life gives you lemons, make lemonade.  That's easier said than done.  It sometimes feels like it takes the length of making wine. And hopefully when it's finished it tastes good or you waited that long for nothing. Okay enough with the metaphors. Especially since I don't even like wine.

My husband has finally let this hit him. And now he has a to take the road ahead. A road that not many have travelled. I have. It's tough. Every day is a decision. Not to be angry. To get out of bed. To put one foot in front of the other.

Asking God "why?"  I'm not sure what the stages of grief are but I know one of them is anger. Probably the biggest one that I've had to go through. Questioning God and just being plain mad!  I don't know what the days ahead look like. I don't know how to help him. I don't think I can other than to be by his side like he was for me and to pray for him. 

There were two devotions I read today (because I missed yesterday). And oh how fitting they were.

It's almost a relief to finally know that he feels something!  But it breaks my heart because I know how much it hurts. I think I know now what to call this post. 

1 comment:

  1. Thank-you, Charis, for sharing your heart... your struggles with us. It urges us to keep praying for you!