So I'm starting to understand that this is very unpredictable. I had to cancel my volunteering engagement at the school today. I think I bit off more than I could chew. The last 2 days I felt great in the morning and completely exhausted by the afternoon. Not just sleepy exhausted but my legs just didn't want to support me and my arms are really tired. Today it's been like that since this morning, however I've still been out and about. Now I need to do some more running around in a couple of hours. I hope I can get through it all.
Yesterday I lost part of my sense of taste but only for a few hours. It was the weirdest thing ever. And it happened "just like that". One minute I could taste and then an hour later, I could hardly taste anything and I got extremely light headed. I'm not sure what that was all about but it's worrysome.
I'm also getting really anxious for my results of my last MRI so I can start some meds. It scares me that new things are happening and that it's not getting better on it's own. It'll be 5 weeks tomorrow since this new bout has started so I had a good cry last night when I went to bed. I don't really ask God why, but I get mad and say that this sucks! I am quite independant and asking for help is actually just too much for me to do right now. I just can't say that "I can't do it". I don't want people looking at me weird when I ask for simple stuff. I've had lots of people volunteer to help out but how do you ask someone to come over and do your dishes or wash your bathrooms or cook you food?? I just can't do that, I can't....Imagine phoning up your friend and saying "oh hey, how's it going? By the way, can you come over some time and clean up my house?" I hate looking normal but feeling so different!
I can, "just try" but it doesn't get the work accomplished fast enough to maintain a house.